Monday Morning Coffee (Thursday Edition)

I know, I know. I am a little late on the Morning Coffee post this week.  Between the holiday weekend at the beach and a busy week at work, this is my first opportunity to post a new entry. No surprise, the beach was amazing.  The hosts were as gracious as ever and we had a great mix of people who kicked-off beach season in style.

Rant of the Week - 

"If you lived here, you'd be home now."  This is one of the dumbest slogans in the history of man.  On the way to Bethany Beach, you pass through the town of Bridgeville, Delaware.  The town of Bridgeville welcomes you to their thriving metropolis with a sign on the side of the road that reads "Welcome to Bridgeville, Delaware - If you lived here you'd be home now."  Is this sign supposed to make me want to move to Bridgeville?  Bridgeville is still a good hour from the beach and it is nowhere near an urban setting.  Basically, it has a Sonic and McDonald's and it is in the middle of the nowhere.  So yeah right I want to live there.  This sign is even more annoying because most of the time you have been sitting in excruciating traffic to get to or from the beach, which is probably the logic behind the sign.  In the end, the logic is flawed because the only thing Bridgeville has to offer is beach traffic.  The sign should read "Welcome to Bridgeville, Delaware - If you lived here you can watch all the beach traffic because there is nothing else to do."

Real Men (And Women) of Genius -

The beach tends to attract some real characters.  With this being opening weekend, the best and the brightest were out in full force.  We had the pleasure of seeing this one gentlemen, if that is even the correct word, on two different occaisons during the course of the weekend.  I would say this man was almost legendary.  Within in moments of seeing this guy in action he was dubbed the "Silver Fox."  Urban Dictionary defines the Silver Fox as an attractive older man who generally has gray and is often desired by younger woman.  Really they should just put this guy's picture there instead.

<-------Silver Fox

 

We first encountered the Silver Fox at the Rusty Rudder in Dewey Beach on Friday night.  He was spotted in the front row of the crowd rocking out to the band and nothing was going to stop his fun on this night.  As you can see his gray haired pseudo mullet is outstanding, but that doesn't tell the whole story of the Silver Fox.  Along with his mini-mullet, he had the hairy arms I have ever seen.  I don't just mean the forearm either.  I mean the entire arm.  I suspect this was a side effect to the anabolic steroids or human growth hormone he is currently using because the dude might be middle aged but he was pretty jacked.  He also had a body guard with a 22 inch neck who scared the crap out of me.  Because we were standing right above the body guard and looking down on the crowd watching the Silver Fox's every move, a friend of mine, "Marisa" was tempted to rub the body guard's bald head.  I convinced her this was bad idea by point out his rather large neck and she refrained from doing so.

Watching the Silver Fox in action was a sight to be hold.  He was rocking out like this was Steeley Dan concert twenty years ago.  The Silver Fox lives for this weekend like a 25 year old lives for this weekend.  He may already be a card carrying member of the AARP, but that was not going to stop him from slamming beers, meeting chicks, and having the time of his life.  One friend, "Megan", was so enamored with him, she wanted to go hang out with him and maybe even rock out if the right song came on.  In the end, she did nothing, which is probably a good thing because you could tell the Silver Fox was a real charmer and who knows what would have happened.  You could tell the Silver Fox had been places.  It was believed that the Silver Fox was patient zero for the sexually transmitted disease, chlamydia.   The night would have been memorable for Megan, but the repercussions could have been rough.  

As Friday night concluded, I thought our time watching the Silver Fox was done for the weekend.  Not so fast my friends.  On Saturday afternoon, the group made its way to the legendary Seacrets and who is there standing in line trying to order a couple Natural Lights and a Dirty Banana?  That's right the Silver Fox with his body guard at his side.  The dude is everywhere.  He was trying to live the beach dream the same way we were.  Seacrets was more crowded on Saturday than I had ever seen it, so keeping tabs on the Silver Fox was impossible.  That said, just seeing the Silver Fox again on Saturday was truly inspiring.  So here's to you Silver Fox "Mr. Hairiest Arms in the World and Living the Dream at 53"  You are a Real Man of Genius.